Discovering the Keys to Successful Partnerships
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Co-creator of Perceptual Style Theory
Have you ever sat down to write an article or prepare a presentation on a subject you thought was going to be a snap, only to discover more complexity than you first suspected? This happened to me recently while I was preparing my presentation on partnerships for my first conference appearance of the year.
What I discovered in my reflection on the subject is that partnership is a simple word that actually represents a very complex relationship between two or more people. Successful partnerships are built on shared intellectual and emotional understanding and require partners to recognize, respect, and work with one another's underlying values and assumptions.
What Is a Partnership?
It is an arrangement (formal or informal) where people agree to cooperate to advance their mutual interests. What we have all come to expect from partnerships is like-minded individuals working together to achieve a common goal – whether that is creating a product, playing a game, or raising a family.
Partnership is based on the concept that together we can accomplish something neither of us could accomplish as well on our own—and that both of us will benefit from the partnership's success. A successful partnership allows us to leverage our own strengths and those of our partners to achieve great things.
Intellectual Understanding
When you are a partner, the implication is that you do not act alone and your actions reflect the interests of both you and your partner. You collaborate, cooperate, and support each other.
This intellectual understanding is the “high common ground”—a shared commitment to accomplishing something and a mutual understanding of partnership as working together toward a common goal for mutual benefit. This is where all partnerships begin. Without a shared goal and a belief in mutual benefit, a partnership never gets off the ground.
Sounds simple, but many partnerships fail because having a common intellectual understanding is not enough. Partnerships exist between individuals, businesses, organizations, even governments, but at the core of every partnership are two or more people, no matter what the organizational structures or labels. Where there are people, there are emotions.
Emotional Understanding and Value Assumptions
The emotional understanding is the basis of unspoken expectations. No one builds a partnership with a stranger; there has to be some common element that brings potential partners together. Maybe we are friends, or we both belong to the same networking group, or we both are in a dance class, or we attend the same church, or we are in the same business, or we meet at a conference.
Whatever the connection, there is always some starting point of commonality. Interestingly, this starting point creates for us unspoken expectations that always involve the following assumptions (in no particular order):
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A common goal
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Shared personal values (ethics)
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Trust
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Mutual advantage
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Complementary skills
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Shared responsibilities
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Loyalty
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Reliability
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Support for each other
Although many of these expectations are common in partnerships, their relative importance can differ significantly from one person to another. Perceptual Style Theory offers a useful perspective on why partners may naturally focus on different aspects of a relationship. What one partner considers essential may be less important to another. When these differences remain unspoken, they can create misunderstandings, disappointment, and conflict that threaten the partnership's success.
Understanding What Matters Most to Your Partner
While one can argue that all of these assumptions are important to a successful partnership, the reality is people value them differently. I may be content to take on more responsibility than my partner, but breach of loyalty is a deal breaker. You may be comfortable that you see long-term advantage where your partner sees short-term advantage, but lack of support on a decision is unacceptable. For the two of us to have a successful partnership, we must understand each other’s priorities and do our best to honor them.
Successful partnerships bring together shared goals, mutual understanding, and respect for the values each person brings to the relationship. When partners take the time to discuss their expectations openly, they create opportunities to appreciate their differences, build trust, and work together more effectively.
Think about your own partnerships. What assumptions have you made about what matters most to the other person? Have you taken the time to discuss those expectations? Share your thoughts or questions in the comments below.
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About Lynda-Ross
Lynda-Ross Vega is a partner at Vega Behavioral Consulting, Ltd. She specializes in helping corporate leaders, entrepreneurs, and individuals with interpersonal communications, team dynamics, personal development, and navigating change. Lynda-Ross is co-creator of Perceptual Style Theory, a revolutionary behavioral psychology theory and assessment system that teaches people how to unleash their natural strengths and build the life and career they dream of.
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